There Are Still Thoughts In My Pocket

I have had a few people approach me recently and say, "Hey, you need to update your blog again... We miss it!"

This means so much to me. The fact that I have several people who not only read my blog, but miss it when I haven't updated and apparently care enough even to say, "Woah! Don't stop." is incredibly encouraging and very much heartwarming.

I admit, I've had a case of writers block for a painfully long amount of time. It's an odd phenomenon, this thing we call writers block. The passion of writing can be a delicious sort of agony when inspiration hits. It's almost painful, like a stab to the chest, but believe me when I say, it's beautiful and its absence hurts much worse. (I suppose that's the way it is with much of the good things in life.)

However, writer's block is not what's been slowing the blog down. Okay, it is! But, it isn't the only reason, and I have NOT stopped writing. I have several posts that are hanging in the air. Some that I simply am not sure how to end, some I don't know how to begin, and a whole bunch that are complete within themselves but lack point and therefore drive. Then there are the bunch that are simply ideas with no words to hem them in... yet.

I completed my first paid writing gig this spring, which I'm stoked about. A real estate agent friend of ours redid his website and had me work on eight different write-ups for a collection of towns in my area. That was fun! He was pleased. I enjoyed it. It was an all around good experience. It gave me hope that what I have chosen to major in in college, is indeed something I enjoy. So, if you don't consider that proof that I'm still writing, you'll have to look somewhere else.

"Brooke, enough with the excuses."

Okay, okay. The point of this post was not to make excuses. Yes, I've been dealing with some writer's block, a lot of it, but I'm not going to let that get in the way.

If you look for writing advice and inspiration anywhere that is of any value, you will find "JUST WRITE" everywhere. You can't make excuses if you want to be a writer. This is, admittedly, something I struggle with more than I'd like to say. Some of you who are my greatest friends and best encouragers have probably seen this in me.

In order to just DO something, sometimes you have to assess what's hanging you up. So, I've been thinking about it, and this is what I have come up with:

There are few things I dislike more than flowery writing. What I mean by this, is whishy-washy, sunsets and rainbows, all is good and we can forget the bad, kind of writing. I tend to have a wordy style, which I like. I appreciate it in my own writing and I enjoy it in the writing of others. While there is often a distinct difference between wordy writing and flowery writing, it is a fine line. When reading the work of others, I can generally tell the difference, but it is hard for me to know how my own words translate to others.

I think this is one of the main reasons I've had such terrible writer's block. The last thing I want my writing to portray is that of the above defined, but it is a rare piece when I can rest assured that my audience will read something that is real, sometimes vulnerable, and at least honest. It scares me, and I'm starting to see that it is in the beginning stages of crippling my writing. THIS IS NOT SOMETHING I'M OKAY WITH!

The first stage to addressing something is recognizing it. The second stage is admitting it. The third stage is doing something about it. That's what I have done, what I am doing, and what I am going to do.

I have decided to take my blog down a tiny bit different path. Not much of one, just a wee change. Up until now, mostly what you have seen is my deepest thinking, the churning of my thoughts, and the crying of my heart. I have loved that, and it is definitely the way I prefer to write. However, it holds me back a little because per human nature the brain doesn't ALWAYS have something deep to say. Sometimes it goes through periods of abundant insight, and sometimes it's just the grinding, the working out, and the making sense of life that we are left with. This is often something not worth writing about. It can be messy and disorganized.

Therefore, my blog is going to start looking a little bit more like what people probably think of when they think of a blog. I'm going to be writing a bit more about my life and it's goings on. There will still be the random musings and the glimpses of the thoughts residing in my pocket, but I'll keep you living my life with me just a little bit more.

I think this will make it easier in a few different departments. Number one being that it should help me update the blog more. There will be more to write about and more flow to squeeze my thoughts into. Number two being that I'm leaving for college and sooo many of you have asked me to let y'all know how my life's transpiring. Number three...I forgot what number three was...there was a number three...well anyway, you get the point.

I definitely have not given up on my writing, and the fact that so many of you continue to show me that my writing means something to you is truly a gift and I do not take it for granted. I have several posts wiggling around in my head right now, so my hope is to have a few (hopefully even several) out by the end of the summer.

Thank you, my friends. Sometime you'll have to let me know what the thoughts in your pocket are. Have a lovely day, and I'll write to you soon.

~TBS